I Want to Hear

I asked a question yesterday and heard no answer from you, Jesus. "What has delighted you about me lately?" It hung in the air unanswered. Maybe there was nothing for you to say. Maybe there was nothing I could hear. I cant list out all the things that must grieve you about me, but this other list is short; Non-existent.

The Accuser wants me to forget you. So he throws out questions: "Does God really care about you?" "Will he really provide?" "Shouldn't you be working towards the things you want yourself?" "Do you really think you're worthy to receive the things you ask for?"

The fact that I can say volumes about what I am not, but little about what I am to you, makes me think I'm not hearing your voice. The accusations of the father of lies fill my ears, but where is your truth? Like a weak-kneed son, I am more willing to hear the taunting, nagging criticism that comes from everywhere but you, then I am to hear what you think of me. I could not bear if it is less than what I hoped for and I am afraid it is more than I could imagine.

So teach my heart to risk and open my ears to you. I would rather hear your voice, true and pure, than all other voices, including mine. Speak and I will listen.